Thursday, February 23, 2012

Oh boy...I mean, Oh girls!

The last few days seemed to have been all about girls. Even in first grade, these young girls can get quite catty and malipulative.
One of my favorite girls, Mary, has had a considerable amount of trouble lately. Recently, I have discovered that some of the other girls in her class have been pushing her buttons purposely to get her in trouble. And succeeding, I might add. What happens is that Mary will be playing with a girl, or group of girls, and they will get a little rough (grabbing at each other, hugging too hard, etc. You know, having fun!). Annie or Nancy, the forementioned girls from Mary's class, will see this going on and start to tell Mary to stop (even though she may not be the one causing the most turmoil). Mary will get upset and tell them she's not doing anything wrong. Well, Nancy just starts pushing the issue and starts to grab Mary's arm. Well, Mary grabs Nancy's hair and pulls. Nancy comes over to me right away and proceeds to tell me what Mary has done and how mean she's being. So, I start looking for Mary. She is nowhere to be seen. Then after a minute, I see her little head pop around the corner of the building. She sees me looking at her and charges! I cry out after her, "Mary, Mary, please don't run away. I saw the whole thing and I know it's not all your fault! I just want to talk." This slows her down a bit. I smile at her and she stops. Then the waterworks start. Nancy told me that Mary bit her as well as pull her hair. Mary told me Nancy was pulling hard on her arm. Come to find out, Mary did NOT bite her but did pull her hair and Nancy did pull Mary's arm. Ok, I tell the girls we need to see their teacher and figure out what the consequences are. Nancy starts walking to the building door. Mary, however, starts to back away and cry, "No, no! I'll get into bigger trouble. My mom and dad will be SO mad at me. I'm going to be in big trouble!" I take her arm, tell her I would be with her and speak to the teacher on her behalf. She continues to pull away from me and shake. I keep talking to her about how it's not all her fault and we just want to help her. I'm basically dragging her to her class (not letting go, as she ran away from me two times before ). We get to her teacher, Mrs. Raleigh, and she indicates that the three of us need to go to the Principal's office to discuss. Mary glues herself to the front entrance of the classroom screaming, "NO, NO!!!" I walkie-talkie the front office for "back up." But finally Mary concedes to go (after gentle coaxing). Nancy is more than happy to tell her side of the story, but, thankfully, the principal is on to her. He lets her know that he is aware of Nancy and Annie's tendencies to get Mary in trouble. He made it very clear that they need to speak truthfully and keep out of other people's business! "Just stay away from each other!" he adds. He then excuses Nancy and myself, so he can talk to Mary alone - yet again this week.
Truthfully, my heart goes out to Mary. Her parents are divorced and she's an only child. One parent is passive and rarely disciplines, as the other parent is somewhat of a dictator. The perfect storm for messing with a kid's brain! So, then it's up to the staff at Westland to try and help this kid cope with her life?

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